巴黎浪漫，维也纳是音乐之都？

巴黎，一座不夜之城、爱情之城，塞纳河畔的艺术与历史之都，拥有世界最著名的标志性建筑。巴黎当之无愧地在全世界享有最浪漫城市的美誉

维也纳的名字始终是和音乐连在一起的。许多音乐大师，如海顿、莫扎特、贝多芬、舒伯特、约翰·斯特劳斯父子、格留克和勃拉姆斯都曾在此度过多年音乐生涯。

所以巴黎是浪漫之都 维也纳是音乐之都

好多欣赏音乐的女孩子想去的两个地方

巴黎铁塔应该就是艾菲尔铁塔吧？应该是the Eiffel Tower，一般是要加the的。

I am staring on you at a corner in a cafe at Elysee street

我觉得应该是staring at吧？

all French are focus on you who is wearing a red cloth while showing the attraction casually

应该是all French' eyes are focused on ,因为focus本来就是动词，这里用被动吧。个人觉得改为all French' eyes比较好。

还有就是a red cloth，应该是a red clothes，cloth是布的意思。

整个句子这样改一下比较好。

all French' eyes are focused on you wearing a red cloth and showing attraction casually

伱觉得呢，伱先看看，我再继续改。

getting high would lose your sight

so how could you feel the romantic Paris

原句是太高，所以getting too high比较好，嗯，其实我个人翻译的话会翻译成stangding too high,应该用getting有种爬上去的感觉，这个伱自己考虑吧。

please come down and I am waiting for you there

there改为here吧。

getting high would make you die 怎么会是die是否打错的？？头晕应该是dizzy吧。

you are too more self-protection from the other这个句子好像有问题哦，保留主谓宾，就成了you are self-protection，而且用the other也不行，the other仅用于两者中剩下的那个

so how could the one who loves you approach near you 我没有见到过approach near的用法，approach 一般与to连用。

这两句一起这样译吧,too more self-protection makes the others loving you couldn't approach

love between you and me is once in a life time 这句话总觉得不通顺，说不出来为什么。

please come down because you are standing too high我觉得用you stand too high好点。

为了保持上下段对称我又重新给伱疏通了一下，请看全文。

the Eiffel Tower

you are standing on the Eiffel Tower

there is a long distance between you and me

I am staring at you at a corner in a cafe at Elysee street

all French' eyes are focused on you wearing a red cloth and showing attraction casually

stangding too high would make you fuzzy

and could't feel the romantic of Paris

too clearly after time goes by

just try to close your eyes to feel the lovely air

please come down and I am waiting for you here

getting high would make you dizzy

too more self-protection makes the others loving you couldn't approach

love between you and me is once in a life time

please value it

please come down because you stand too high

这是根据伱的做的改动，但其实都不是很好，因为伱基本上都是按照语法结构来翻译的,但是歌词其实是要求简练、形式自由，而且要求押韵，押韵现在我们一般都还做不到（这是专业人士做的努力），但是简练也比较容易做到，下面伱看我翻译的。

站在巴黎铁塔的你 Standing on the top of the Eiffel Tower

高不可攀是我们的距离 Too distant is our distance

香榭利大街的咖啡厅 In a cafe at Elysee street

一个不起眼的角落有个我专注着你 I am staring at you in an unattractive conner

法国的焦点开始转移France's fouse is change

所有的目光落在了那个红衣少女All the eyes fouse on the red clothes girl

不经意的自然魅力Casual nature attraction

发挥着她最大的威力Shows her great glamour

你站得太高 Too high you stand

会看不清 Too fuzzy your sight

巴黎的浪漫 Paris's romantic

后知后觉你才清醒Too late when you realize

试着闭着眼睛 Just try to close your eyes

去感受这浓浓气息 to feel the strong fragrance

快下来吧我等着你 Come downI'm here waiting

你站得太高 Too high you stand

就会头晕 Too dizzy you feel

自我保护的多心 Self-protection heart

爱你的人都却步难行 Too difficult the others loving you

这份缘一生一次 Only once in life

请务必要珍惜 Please value our love

快下来吧你有点高了 Come down quicklyYou stand too high

我尽量做到了押韵，但这的确很难，不过上下结构我都尽力做到了对称。歌词形式很自由，不必过于拘束于语法。比如名词的叠用、互相修饰，像Self-protection heart形式，其实在书面语中也是可以用的。