急求英语对话，要幽默的．不需要太长，最好付有中文翻译．谢谢！

BOY : May I hold your hand

我可以牵你的手吗？

GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy

不用了，谢谢，他们不重

GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!

说你爱我，说你爱我

BOY : You love me

你爱我

GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring

如果我们订婚你会送我戒指（ring也只打电话）吗？

BOY : Sure, what's your phone number

当然，你电话几号？

GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest

我认为最穷的人是最开心的。

BOY : Then marry me and we'll be th e happiest couple

那你嫁给我吧，我们会是最开心的一对

GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever

BOY : Don't you ever want to improve

BOY : I love you and I could die for you!

GIRL : How soon

BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!

GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there

SHARON : Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning kiss

TRACY : I did once He'd forgotten to take the cigarette out of his mouth

MAN : You remind me of the sea

你使我想起大海

WOMAN : Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting

是因为我狂野，浪漫和兴奋吗？

M AN : NO, because you make me sick

不是，因为你使我反感

WIFE : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out of the other

你和男人讲话的时候，他们左耳进右耳出

HUSBAND : You tell a woman something: It goes in both ears and comes out of the mouth

你和女人讲话的时候，他们两只耳朵听，从嘴巴出

MARY : John says I'm pretty Andy says I'm uglyWhat do u think,

Peter

PETER : A bit of both I think you're pretty ugly

1) Girlfriend : "And are you sure you love me and no one else "

Boyfriend : "Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday"

2) Teacher : "Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon"

Pupil : "The moon"

Teacher : "Why"

Pupil : "The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it"

3) Teacher : "What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested"

Pupil : "A teacher"

4) Waiter : "Would you like your coffee black"

Customer : "What other colors do you have"

5) My father is so old that when he was in school, history was called current affairs

6) Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot !"

Sam : "It's a family tradition"

Teacher : "What do you mean"

Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher"

Teacher : "What about your mother"

Sam : "She's a woman"

7) Tom : "How should I convey the news to my father that I've failed"

David: "You just send a telegram: Result declared, past year's performance repeated"

8) Teacher : "Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing"

Student : "Brotherly love"

9) Teacher : "Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating"

Sam : "No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook"

10) Patien t : "What are the chances of my recovering doctor"

Doctor : "One hundred percent Medical records show that nine out of ten people die of the disease you have Yours is the tenth case I've treated The others all died"

11) Teacher : " Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE"

One Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day and at the same time"

12) Teacher : " George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it

Now do you know why his father didn't punish him "

One Student: " Because George still had the axe in is hand"

场景一

A: Hey , ,what are you doing here

B: hello, I’m reading a fashion magazine Would you like read with me together

A: Sure ,I ’d love to

B:OK, come here and take a seat

A: Thank you

B: Look at all these clothes designed by top fashion designers like Versacci, Calvin Klein, and Vivienne Westwood What do you think of them

A: Well, they look lovely, but they’re not very practical I mean, would you wear that dress to school or walking down the street

B: I know what you mean People would stare at you in amazement if you wore something like that in an everyday situation I suppose only stars or rich people wear them at parties

A: Maybe I’m not sure why they have fashion shows like this Hardly anyone will buy those clothes The clothes you see are nothing like the ones that ordinary people wear It seems like a waste of money

B: I think that the designers hold these fashion shows for a few reasons First ,it’s just like a big party They can meet each other and network The other things is that it is great advertising All the journalists and photographers are there Thirdly, it gives them a chance to show what they would like to see people wearing

A: You mean it’s an expression of their fantasies

B: Yes, I think the designers are saying that these clothes are what they would like to see people wear if those people weren’t concerned with what other people might think In a way, the designers are saying: don’t worry about what others think Wear what you like!

A: Very philosophical I think they design these clothes more for publicity They try to see who can be the most extreme and outrageous, but still stylish

B: Come on All this fashion has reminded me that I want to buy some clothes

A: Oh great ,let’s go shopping

场景二

A: What do you think of this coat Do you think it suits me

B: Sure Why don’t you try it on The fitting room is over there

A: It’s just the right size-a perfect fit! Have you seen anything you likes

B: Yes Do you think I am fashionable in this dress

A: I think so Blue is still fashionable at the moment

B: this style came out last year, though I like the dress, but I’m not sure whether last year’s fashions will be same this year Besides, It would be a little expensive

A: Oh, you’d better give it up and look for some other pieces

B: Then, what about this sweater I’m thinking about buying one I know it’s June now, but it will be perfect for autumn and winter

A: It looks too big for you, but I like the color and the material is good quality Is it on sale

B: Yes, it’s half price It’s supposed to be too large-that’s the fashion

A: I might get one too, but in a different colour I prefer light blue to white

B: There It looks great, don’t you think I’m going to get these jeans as well I need a new pair Look at this one-- doesn’t it look cool

A: Yes, it’s really smart I’d like to get some jeans too, but I don’t have enough cash on me

B: Don’t worry I’ve got my credit card You can pay me back later

A: Thanks! Now I don’t need to come back to the shop a second time

B: You’re welcome

场景3

度假村的预约（01:00 PM）

Having Fun on the Phone with Lisa

I called Lisa, the sales manager

I told her that a nice couple will visit next month and asked her to take good care of them

It’s been more than 2 years since I’ve worked with Lisa at the hotel in Hong Kong

Talking to her on the phone is always pleasant because she is such a bright person

Lisa is interested in studying Korean these days

She always greets me and says goodbye in Korean

She studies Korean to help the Korean guests, but she also has another purpose

She wants to find herself a Korean boyfriend! She probably has been watching too many Korean dramas

The truth is that not all Korean men are like the actors in drama

Would she be able to live in Korea with a Korean guy

Just the thought of it makes me laugh!

TRANS

我给度假村的经理丽莎打了通电话。

我告诉她下个月有一对佳偶要去度假，并且拜托她好好照顾他们。

我跟丽莎合作已经两年了。

和爽朗的她通话总会使我开心。

最近丽莎对学习韩语非常感兴趣。

通话时，开头和结尾她都用韩语讲。

为韩国客人服务是她学韩语的原因之一，其实她还另有算盘呢。

她说想找个韩国人做男朋友！可能她看韩剧看多了吧。

其实不是每个韩国男人都像电视里的主人公那样浪漫。

丽莎会不会跟她的韩国男朋友一起在韩国幸福地生活呢？

想起来就想笑！

这么多够了吧。。。

Ada Judy Sally

A: Hello, everybody, welcome everyone to watch today's love programs in China, today we have invited guests from the UK from the United States Judy and Sally Now let us into today's program, to hear their story!

A: Hi, Judy, you lived in China for several years

J: I was only to China in 2008

A: You do, Sally

S: I have lived in China for 3 years

A: able to talk with me about why you chose to come Chinese life

J: In 2008, my family came to watch the Beijing Olympics, China, during that time I met my current boyfriend, we love each other very much, my family are very fond of him, so I decided to stay In China, as Chinese wife

A: in a foreign country to find their loved ones, I am very romantic, when are you going to get married

J: it should fall this year, I think the beautiful autumn in Beijing

A: You're right, Beijing's autumn is indeed beautiful, God bless

J: Thank you

A: Sally it is a Chinese wife to do it

S: No, I'm married, my husband is American, we are all educators in the United States, three years ago, we came to China because of a public high school, we are very like the group of lovely children, We decided to stay in China to continue our education

A: I think the kids love you very much, thank you can stay in China for China's contributions to education Would you know what China is a country

S: I like Chinese people a sincere, warm We came here, got a lot of people to help, make a lot of friends, though living in a foreign country, there are home-like warmth We are also very like the Chinese kids, they pretty simple, so we do not want to leave here

J: I felt this, and I think China is a beautiful country with a unique flavor, it can be attractive

A: ah, thank you can share your story, no matter which country we come from, now we are all one family, I hope you have more and more friends, being happy in China Well, let's talk here today, thank you for coming!

J, S: Thank you, Ada

用谷歌翻译