张培基英译散文赏析之《雨前》

雨前

Praying For Rainfall

何其芳

He Qifang

| 译文摘自张培基《英译中国散文选二》

最后的鸽羣带着低弱的笛声在微风里划一个圈子后，也消失了。也许是误认这灰暗的凄冷的天空为夜色的来袭，或是也预感到风雨的将至，遂过早地飞回它们温暖的木舍。

The last flock of pigeons have also gone out of sight after doing their final circling in the soft breeze

the sound of their whistles barely audible They are hastening back to their warm wooden dovecote earlier than usual perhaps because they have mistaken the bleak leaden sky for nightfall or because of their presentiment of a storm

要点：

1，此题目可译为Before the Rain

现按久旱盼甘霖的主题，把它译为praying for the rain

其中，praying for 的意思是”求“或”祈祷“

2，“带着低弱的笛声“译为the sound of their whistles barely audible，即”勉强能听到“或”几乎听不到“，译为faint sound of their whistle也是可以的，张培基中还提供了一种译法，即the sound of the whistle trailing off

但我认为不如前两种确切。

3，hasten to someplace意即赶往某地，之前见到过~

4，误认为=mistaken for

综述：

本文的妙处在于大量拟人的运用。作者托物言志，借景抒情，流露出不满现实，的心态。而拟人体现在翻译中，大部分是通过动词的运用

本段还有presentiment等词，也给文章增色不少。

几天的阳光在柳条上撤下的一抹嫩绿，被尘土埋掩得有憔悴色了，是需要一次洗涤。还有干裂的大地和树根也早已期待着雨。雨却迟疑着。

The willow igs

daubed with a light green by several days of sunshine

are now covered all over with the dust and look so sickly that they need to be washed And the perched soil and tree roots have likewise been dying for rainfall Yet the rain is reluctant to e down

要点：

1，“几天的阳光在柳条上撤下的一抹嫩绿，被尘土埋掩得有憔悴色了，是需要一次洗涤。“译为The willow igs

daubed with a light green by several days of sunshine

are now covered all over with the dust and look so sickly that they need to be washed此处作者采取了顺译的方法，重点注意译者对”洒下“”埋掩“的处理~这句话中的嫩绿也可以直译为柳条上的枝叶。译为the light green willow leaves brought on by several days of sunshine now

covered all over with dust

look so sickly and hence need to be washed

2

期待着=dying for

与前文的pray for相呼应，与主题相呼应；迟疑着即“不愿意下“=be reluctant to

综述：注意译者对于细节描写的处理，dying for

和be reluctant to

生动贴切~

我怀想着故乡的雷声和雨声。那隆隆的有力的搏击，从山谷返响到山谷，仿佛春之芽就从冻土里震动，惊醒，而怒茁出来。细草样柔的雨丝又以温存之手抚摸它，使它簇生油绿的枝叶而开出红色的花。这些怀想如乡愁一样萦绕得使我忧郁了。我心里的气候也和这北方大陆一样缺少雨量，一滴温柔的泪在我枯涩的眼里，如迟疑在这阴沉的天空里的雨点，久不落下。

I can never fet the thunderstorm we often had in my home town Over there

whenever the rumble of thunder reverberated across the valley

the buds of spring would seem to sprout freely after being disturbed and roused up from their slumber in the frozen soil Then tenderly stroked by the soft hands of fine rain

they would put forth bright green leaves and pink flowers It makes me nostalgic and melancholy to think about the old times and my mind is as depressed as the vast expanse of North China is thirsty A tear stands in my dull eye and

like the rain lingering in the murky sky

is slow to roll down

要点：

1，“那隆隆的有力的搏击，从山谷返响到山谷，仿佛春之芽就从冻土里震动，惊醒，而怒茁出来。“译为Over there

whenever the rumble of thunder reverberated across the valley

the buds of spring would seem to sprout freely after being disturbed and roused up from their slumber in the frozen soil 原文中的3个动词。”振动惊醒，和怒茁“其实是递升的关系，张先生在翻译时同时运用了主动语态和被动语态，使得原文的递升意义不复存在。现提供另一段译文。Those mighty crashes rumbled and reverberated from mountain valley to mountain valley

as if the new shoots of spring were shaking in the frozen gound

awakening

and bursting forth with a terrifying vigour。这段译文很好地体现了递升的手法，同学们可以对比记忆。

2，“细草样柔的雨丝又以温存之手抚摸它，使它簇生油绿的枝叶而开出红色的花。“突出地使用书面语或文学性词汇，也是本文的特色之一，加之这句话既有通感，又有拟人，因此在选词方面要尤为注意

3，“我心里的气候也和这北方大陆一样缺少雨量“不宜按字面直译，可理解为” 我的心情抑郁，和北方大地干旱达到同样严重的程度。“将其比喻的意思翻出来，译为my mind is as depressed as the vast expanse of North China is thirsty

4，“久不落下“汉语的否定结果比较单纯，否定词只有“不”、“非”、“否”、“勿”、“别”、“无”、“未”、“莫”、“不是”、“没有”、“决不”、“毫无”、“几乎没有”、“几乎不”等简单的词汇，汉语的传统是倾向于动词否定。

而英语的否定除借助词汇手段外，还借助句子结构和特殊表达方式来表达否定概念，既有动词否定，也有名词否定的习惯。

此处译者译为is slow to roll down

是使用系表结构~表达了了形式上肯定，意义上否定的方法。

综述：

注意本段讲的否定句的译法~实际翻译时为了符合英语表达习惯，我们可以“形肯意否“或采取否定转移的方法~

白色的鸭也似有一点烦躁了，有不洁的颜色的都市的河沟里传出它们焦急的叫声。有的还未厌倦那船一样的徐徐的划行。有的却倒插它们的长颈在水里，红色的蹼趾伸在尾后，不停地扑击着水以支持身体的平衡。不知是在寻找沟底的细微食物，还是贪那深深的水里的寒冷。

White ducks have also bee somewhat impatient Some are sending out irritated quacks from the turbid waters of an urban creek Some keep swimming leisurely and tirelessly like a slow boat Some have their long necks submerged headfirst in the water while sticking up their webbed feet behind their tails and splashing them desperately so as to keep their balance There is no knowing if they are searching for tiny bits of food from the bottom of the creek or just enjoying the chill of the deep water

要点：

在处理多层定语句“有不洁的颜色的都市的河沟里传出它们焦急的叫声“是译者采用了后置定语来翻译，译为the turbid waters of an urban creek，

2，第二个多层定语句“那船一样的徐徐的划行“译者巧妙地按其功能处理为了方式状语

swimming leisurely and tirelessly like a slow boat

3，“不知是在寻找沟底的细微食物，还是贪那深深的水里的寒冷。“中的”不知…”=there is no knowing…

并且对于“寒冷”一词的处理也比较贴切。

综述：

汉语定语一般为前置，而且很少使用超过两层以上的多层定语，这是汉语的传统。在英语翻译语言的影响下，现代汉语的多层前置定语已经成为普遍现象。与汉语相比，英语名词常常有多层定语限制，这些定语或前置或后置，或前后合并使用。明白了这些汉英差异，做起翻译也会稍微得心应手。

有几个已上岸了。在柳树下来回地作绅士的散步，舒息划行的疲劳。然后参差地站着，用嘴细细地抚理它们遍体白色的羽毛，间或又摇动身子或扑展着阔翅，使那缀在羽毛间的水珠坠落。一个已修饰完毕的，弯曲它的颈到背上，长长的红嘴藏没在翅膀里，静静合上它白色的茸毛间的小黑眼，仿佛准备睡眠。可怜的小动物，你就是这样做你的梦吗

Some of them stagger out of the water and

to relieve their fatigue

begin to saunter up and down with a gentleman-like swagger in the shade of the willow trees Then

they stand about to preen their white plumage carefully Occasionally they give themselves a sudden shake or flap their long wings to let off water drops from among their feathers One of them

after grooming itself

turns round its neck to rest on the back

then buries its long red beak under its wings and quietly closes its all black eyes tucked away among the white find hair Apparently it is getting ready to sleep Poor little creature

is that the way you sleep

要点：

1，“有几个已上岸了。”译为Some of them stagger out of the water，其中stagger较e更加可取，因根据Longman词典，swagger一词作为动词的意思是to walk with a swinging movement

as if proud大摇大摆地走; 趾高气扬地走；作为名词的意思是 proud manner of walking昂首阔步；趾高气扬的走路姿态。

2，“然后参差地站着，用嘴细细地抚理它们遍体白色的羽毛，间或又摇动身子或扑展着阔翅，使那缀在羽毛间的水珠坠落。”在此译者译为Then

they stand about to preen their white plumage carefully Occasionally they give themselves a sudden shake or flap their long wings to let off water drops from among their feathers两个分句，我们也可以将原句以“站”、“抚理”、“摇动”、“扑展”等并列动词构成的一句，从语法的角度可以理解为一个并列句，以多动词句的角度理解翻译，译为Then

standing in disarray

preening their white plumage carefully

they occasionally gave themselves a sudden shake or flap their long wings to let off water drops from among their feathers

3，“一个已修饰完毕的，弯曲它的颈到背上，长长的红嘴藏没在翅膀里，静静合上它白色的茸毛间的小黑眼，仿佛准备睡眠。”译为One of them

after grooming itself

turns round its neck to rest on the back

then buries its long red beak under its wings and quietly closes its all black eyes tucked away among the white find hair 对于这种多动词的句子，使用现在分词和过去分词是最常用的方法。

4，“你就是这样做你的梦吗”译者在此将做梦译为sleep，个人觉得dream 更好一些~

综述：

注意本段长句的综合技巧，有时对于参考译文我们要辩证的看待。

我想起故乡放雏鸭的人了。一大羣鹅**的雏鸭游牧在溪流间。清浅的水，两岸青青的草，一根长长的竹竿在牧人的手里。他的小队伍是多么欢欣地发出啾啁声，又多么驯服地随着他的竿头越过一个田野又一个山坡！夜来了，帐幕似的竹篷撑在地上，就是他的家。但这是怎样辽远的想象啊！在这多尘土的国度里，我仅只希望听见一点树叶上的雨声。

The scene recalls to my mind the duckling raiser in my home town With a long bamboo pole in hand

he would look after a large flock of gosling-yellow ducklings moving about on the limpid water of a shallow brook flanked on both sides by green grass How the little creatures jig-jigged merrily! How they obediently followed the bamboo pole to scamper over field after field

hillside after hillside! When night fell

the duckling raiser would make his home in a tent-like bamboo shed Oh

that is something of the distant past! Now

in this dusty country of ours

what I yearn for is to hear the drip-drip of rain beating against leaves

要点：

1，“清浅的水，两岸青青的草，一根长长的竹竿在牧人的手里” 与英语比较起来，汉语在表达思想时，有突出主题而忽略主语的现象。因此对于无主句我们通常要找主语，而主语通常为已知的信息。此处译者将此句译为With a long bamboo pole in hand

he would look after a large flock of gosling-yellow ducklings moving about on the limpid water of a shallow brook flanked on both sides by green grass不仅译出主语，还做了变通，显出文学性，但我们在翻译这类句子是，一般采用顺译的方法，比较保险。下面两种译法供大家参考A great swarm of yellowish crane ducklings floated in the streams

the shallow blue water beneath

the green grass on both banks

and the long bamboo pole in the hands of the tender

A great crowd of light yellow ducklings would be taken to the waters of the creek----limpid water

lush green grass on the banks

and a long bamboo staff in the herder's hand

2，“他的小队伍是多么欢欣地发出啾啁声”翻译拟声词时，虽然英语和汉语有很多词是可以对应的，但汉语的拟声词作为形容词，而英语的拟声词多为动词和名词。因此我们在翻译的时候要对词性和句形做调整。“唧唧叫”可译为cheep或chirp，jig-jig做拟声词用到的不多，（查完词典发现它居然还有些少儿不宜的意思，，，，建议大家还是用c开头的两个~

“这是怎样辽远的想象啊！”可以用how，此处用的that，同学们也可以学习下~译者使用现在时翻译，增加描述的生动性和现实感

综述：无主句，拟声词，感叹句，每个都不能忽略~

我仰起头。天空低垂如灰色雾幕，落下一些寒冷的碎屑到我脸上。一只远来的鹰隼仿佛带着愤怒，对这沉重的天色的愤怒，平张的双翅不动地从天空斜插下，几乎触到河沟对岸的土阜，而又鼓扑着双翅，作出猛烈的声响腾上了。那样巨大的翅使我惊异。我看见了它两胁间斑白的羽毛。

When I look up at a gray misty pall of a low-hanging sky

some dust particles feel chilly on my face A hawk

seemingly irked by the gloomy sky

swoops down sideways out of nowhere

with wings wide-spread and immovable

until it almost hits the hillock on the other side of the brook But it soars skywards again with a loud flap I am amazed by the tremendous size of its wings And I also catch sight of the grizzled feathers on its underside

要点：

1，“天空低垂如灰色雾幕”译为a gray misty pall of a low –hanging sky

等于a low-hanging sky resembling a gray misty pall同样的栗子如：a toy of a house=a toy-like house

a dwarf of a man=a dwarf –like a man

2

”远来的“译为out of nowhere(不知从哪儿来的)

通常我们译为ing from afar

但前者更为传神贴切。

3，“沉重的天色”是一个移就修辞格的表达，作者把原来属于形容人的心情的“沉重”

转移到形容非生命的“天空”，译为the gloomy sky，也可以参考第一段译为leaden sky

综述：

在描写“鹰“时，译者又运用了大量生动形象的动词。需要注意接着听见了它有力的鸣声，如同一个巨大的心的呼号，或是在黑暗里寻找伴侣的叫唤。

然而雨还是没有来。

Then I hear its loud cry — like a powerful voice from the bottom of its heart or a call in the dark for its rades in arms still no rain

要点：

1，“伴侣“此处有”战友“的含义，故译rade in arms

2

” 然而雨还是没有来” 语篇中有一些与长句交织在一起的短句，这些短句的不时出现，像音乐中不时出现在主旋律旁边的一个副旋律，共同组合成一个和谐的音乐篇章。因此对于这个短句，译者也进行了短句处理。长短句结合，体现散文的美美美！

综述：

在词语选择上，多书面化和文学性的用语。还有使用大量修辞，译文中的不少动词，值得我们积累和借鉴~本文句式偏欧化，即多长句（多层定语，多层状语，多层散句）理解不难，但很考验译者的翻译功底。

　　中文：

　有几个已上岸了。在柳树下来回地作绅士的散步，舒息划行的疲劳。然后参差地站着，用嘴细细地抚理它们遍体白色的羽毛，间或又摇动身子或扑展着阔翅，使那缀在羽毛间的水珠坠落。一个已修饰完毕的，弯曲它的颈到背上，长长的红嘴藏没在翅膀里，静静合上它白色的茸毛间的小黑眼，仿佛准备睡眠。可怜的小动物，你就是这样做你的梦吗

　英文：

　Some of them stagger out of the water and, to relieve their fatigue, begin to saunter up and down with a gentleman-like swagger in the shade of the willow trees Then, they stand about to preen their white plumage carefully Occasionally they give themselves a sudden shake or flap their long wings to let off water drops from among their feathers One of them, after grooming itself, turns round its neck to rest on the back, then buries its long red beak under its wings and quietly closes its small black eyes tucked away among the white find hair Apparently it is getting ready to sleep Poor little creature, is that the way you sleep

　要点：

　1，“有几个已上岸了。”译为Some of them stagger out of the water，其中stagger较come更加可取，因根据Longman词典，swagger一词作为动词的意思是to walk with a swinging movement, as if proud大摇大摆地走; 趾高气扬地走；作为名词的意思是 proud manner of walking昂首阔步；趾高气扬的走路姿态。

　2，“然后参差地站着，用嘴细细地抚理它们遍体白色的羽毛，间或又摇动身子或扑展着阔翅，使那缀在羽毛间的水珠坠落。”在此译者译为Then, they stand about to preen their white plumage carefully Occasionally they give themselves a sudden shake or flap their long wings to let off water drops from among their feathers两个分句，我们也可以将原句以“站”、“抚理”、“摇动”、“扑展”等并列动词构成的一句，从语法的角度可以理解为一个并列句，以多动词句的角度理解翻译，译为Then, standing in disarray, preening their white plumage carefully, they occasionally gave themselves a sudden shake or flap their long wings to let off water drops from among their feathers

　3，“一个已修饰完毕的，弯曲它的颈到背上，长长的红嘴藏没在翅膀里，静静合上它白色的茸毛间的小黑眼，仿佛准备睡眠。”译为One of them, after grooming itself, turns round its neck to rest on the back, then buries its long red beak under its wings and quietly closes its small black eyes tucked away among the white find hair 对于这种多动词的句子，使用现在分词和过去分词是最常用的方法。

　4，“你就是这样做你的梦吗”译者在此将做梦译为sleep，个人觉得dream 更好一些~

　综述：

　注意本段长句的综合技巧，有时对于参考译文我们要辩证的看待。

多一只碟子

One Saucer More

金圣华

Jin Shenghua

| 译文摘自张培基《英译中国散文选二》

从朋友口中，听到一则轶事。

I’ve been told the following anecdote by a friend of mine:

要点：首先增主语“我”，在表示“别人告诉我”时，通常用被动I’ve been told…/I was told…简洁明了，不拖泥带水

电子学教授陈之藩当年自美国来香港中文大学履新，临行之前，与夫人在家中整理行装。陈教授夫妇有一套精美的茶具，收拾装箱时，一不小心，打破了一只茶杯。

When Chen Chih-fan

professor of electronics

was about to leave the US for Hong Kong to take up his new post at the Chinese University of Hong Kong

he did packing at home with his wife They owned a beautiful tea set

but while packing up

they had one of the cups broken through carelessness

要点：

1，“履新”即“就任新职”，译为take up his new post

2

“电子学教授陈之藩当年自美国来香港中文大学履新，临行之前，与夫人在家中整理行装。”合译时，将前两个分句看做时间状语，即“在…将要去就任新职前，与夫人在家中整理行装”，译为When Chen Chih-fan

professor of electronics

was about to leave the US for Hong Kong to take up his new post at the Chinese University of Hong Kong

he did packing at home with his wife

一般人的反应，一定是感到十分心疼，好端端的成套茶具，打破一只杯，如何去配？

Ordinary people would have got very upset over it

as it was always troublesome to replace the broken cup to plete the set

谁知陈教授的反应却不然，他莞尔一笑，坦然说道：“真不错，又多了一只碟子！”

Professor Chen

however

reacted to it differently He said calmly with a ile

“Wow! Now we’ve got one saucer more!”

要点：

1，“一般人的反应，一定是感到十分心疼”即“一般人一定会很心疼”，其中“十分心疼”即“十分心烦”，译为 very upset

或much distressed

全句译为Ordinary people would have got very upset over it，注意虚拟语气的使用~

2，“好端端的“根据上下文可以理解为”完整的”或“原本成套的”

3

” 如何去配”即“如何来找另一只来代替”，用replace

“好端端的成套茶具，打破一只杯，如何去配”整句可理解为“换一只茶杯，和茶具配套是很麻烦的”

4

“莞尔一笑”意为“美好地笑“此处译为 ile即可

综述：注意以上的合译，虚拟语气~

凡事从好处想，这种能耐，在现实生活中，确能使人受益无穷。

The attitude of always looking on the bright side of things will definitely be of inestimable benefit to us in our real life

要点：

1，“能耐“本意为”本领，能力“现按”态度“理解，译为attitude

2

”使人受益无穷“= be of inestimable benefit to us

陈之藩教授不但是位杰出的科学家，也是位了不起的散文家，他的一些散文集，清新隽永，当年曾使我折服不已。如今回想起来，令我惊叹的，不仅仅是他那优美的文笔，而是字里行间流露出来的睿智与巧思。

Professor Chen has distinguished himself both as a scientist and an essayist His prose writings

which have been published in several collections

are known for their fresh and expressive style I was struck with admiration when I first read them

and I remember how I marvelled then at the keen insight and wisdom displayed beeen the lines as well as his beautiful language

要点：

1，此处的“不但…也”表“既…又”，因此译为both and

2，“清新隽永”即一般指文章很清雅

耐人寻味，译为fresh and expressive

3，“使我折服不已”意为I was struck with admiration，其中struck（strike）意为“给（某人以…）印象；让（某人）觉得” 形象地表现出了“不已”的意思

4，A as well as B

翻译时先翻后面的内容，即“B与/及A

”或“不但B而且A”

人生不如意事常八九，这是一句老话，老得几乎令人不想再重复，可是生命的旅程，行行复行行，在漫长的旅途上，的确会遇上一重又一重的挫折。

Things seldom go one’s way That’s a popular saying too old to warrant re-quoting But

one will certainly meet with one setback after another on his life’s long journey

要点：

1，“人生不如意事常八九“即” 很少有事情如人所愿“译为Things seldom go one’s way

2，“老得几乎令人不想再重复“译为That’s a popular saying too old to warrant re-quoting，其中warrant意为”需要“

每当失意时，人总觉得别人为什么比自己幸运？别人生意兴隆、仕途平坦、财源广进、名成利就；自己为什么如老牛破车，踽踽独行在暮色四合的郊道上？果真如此吗？杯中只有一半水，有人喜孜孜说：“好呀！ 还有半杯”， 有人愁眉苦脸：“哎呀！只剩下半杯了”，分别就在这里。

When frustrated

one is apt to wonder why the more fortunate can fare so well either in business or officialdom

making a pile or enjoying both fame and wealth

while he himself

like an old ox pulling a rickety cart

has to trudge all by himself on a country road thick with that true Now take for example a cup half filled with water Some

in the face of it

may exclaim with delight

“Great

the cup is half full!” Some may grumble gloomily

“Too bad

the cup is half empty!” You see how the o kinds of people differ

要点：

1，“生意兴隆、仕途平坦“= fare so well either in business or officialdom，四字词堆叠时只译本意

2，“财源广进、名成利就“= making a pile or enjoying both fame and wealth

其中making a pile意为”发财“，也可译作amass a fortune

3

” 老牛破车”即“老牛拉破车“译为

like an old ox pulling a rickety cart

4，“好呀！ 还有半杯”， “哎呀！只剩下半杯了”译者采取了相对口语化的译法，并没有直译为we still have a cup

或there is only half a cup left

综述：

文采斐然的作品必然夹带着许多的四字词和多动词句，我们要不断加强自己的双语驾驭能力，才能让自己的译文更加不断进步

高出何处有

For the Mountaintop

张晓风

Zhang Xiaofeng

赠给毕业同学

-- To Students of the Graduating Class

| 译文摘自张培基《英译中国散文选二》

很久很久以前，在一个很远很远的地方，一位老酋长正病危。

Long

long ago

in a very

very faraway place

a tribal chief found himself terminally ill

要点：

1

《高出何处有》即“哪里是山顶”，可直译为Where to Find the Mountain

此处译为For the Mountaintop，意即“攀登高峯”更加突出了文章的主旨

2

faraway这是个需要注意的词，经常被误用，一般来说， faraway是形容词

做定语或表语 away是短语

做状语

如： Many faraway stellar systems can be observed through a space telescope

借助太空望远镜可以观察到许多离我们很远的恒星系。

Far away

and down near the horizon

the sky began to turn grey

在遥远的地平线附近，天空开始渐渐变成灰色。

3，“正病危”，“病危”可译为be critically ill be dying

be critically ill; be terminally ill; be at one's last gasp

4，“酋长”可译为tribunal chief

综述：很少出对话体的散文分析，因为它在考试中并不常见，但是这次选定张晓风的这篇文，一是文笔优美，有许多语言现象值得关注，二是这篇短文十分耐人寻味，值得译，更值得读。开头短短的一句，比较容易~

他找来村中最优秀的三个年轻人，对他们说：“这是我要离开你的时候了，我要你们为我做最后一件事。你们三个都有是身强体壮而又智慧过人的好孩子，现在，请你们尽其可能的去攀登那座我们一向奉为神圣的大山。你们要尽其可能爬到最高的、最凌越一切的地方，然后，折回头来告诉我你们的见闻。”

He summoned three most promising young villager to his bedside and said

“As I’m leaving you soon

I hope you can do one thing more for me Young men

you three are all unusually strong and resourceful

so I’d like you to strive to climb that high mountain which we’ve always been worshipping as a sacred place Now do your best to reach the topmost and most forbidding part of it and then turn back to tell me about your findings”

要点：

1，“他找来村中最优秀的三个年轻人，对他们说”中的“找来”即“召唤，召集”译为sunmmon或call together

2

” 村中最优秀的三个年轻人”译得很有意思，不是three most promising young of the village 而是译为villager，增加了行文的简洁性

3，to his bedside是增益成分，增强文章的画面感

4，“为我做最后一件事”通常我们会译为 to do the last thing for me

但the last thing 也有“最不愿意干的事”的意思，因此此处译为do one thing more for me

5，“最凌越的”即“最难通过的，最险恶的”，故译为most forbidding part

6，“见闻”可理解为“发现”译为findings

三天后，第一个年轻人回来了，他笑生双靥，衣履犹鲜：“酋长，我到达山顶了，我看到繁花夹道，流泉淙淙，鸟鸣嘤嘤，那地方真不坏啊！”老酋长笑笑说：“孩子，那条路我当年也走过，你说的鸟语花香的地方不是山顶，而是山麓。你回去吧！”

Three days later

the first young man returned artly dressed and said with iling face

“Lord

I’ve been to the mountaintop where I saw flowers of all sorts lining both sides of a path

babbling spring water and singing birds That’s a real nice place”The old tribal chief replied ilingly

“Son

I’ve been there before The place with singing birds and fragrant flowers

as you mentioned

is not the mountaintop It’s the foot of the mountain Now you can leave”

要点：

1，“笑生双靥，衣履犹鲜”都是表年轻人的状态，分别译为副词或with结构

2，“我看到繁花夹道，流泉淙淙，鸟鸣嘤嘤”即“我看到各种各样的花长在道路两旁，我看到淙淙的流水和鸣唱的鸟儿”，将主谓结构转为偏正

3，“孩子”可译为young man

此处译为son，因英语中年长者用它称呼男孩或年轻男子

4，“山麓”即“山脚”译为the foot of the mountain

一周以后，第二年年轻人也回来了，他神情疲倦，满脸风霜：“酋长，我到达山顶了。我看到高大肃穆的松树林，我看到秃鹰盘旋，那是一个好地方。”“可惜啊！孩子，地不是山顶，那是山腰。不过，也难为你了，你回去吧！”

A week later

the second young man also returned He looked terribly weary and his face was weather-beaten“Lord

I’ve been to the mountaintop where I saw groves of tall

solemn pine trees and vultures circling in the air That’s a real nice place”“What a pity!” said the tribal chief “Son

you’ve been halfway up the mountain rather than to its summit But you had a real tough time Now you can leave”

要点：

1，“满面风霜”按“饱经风霜”常用于形容经历过种种的艰难困苦生活的磨练，译为weather-beaten（经历过各种天气）

2，“不过，也难为你了”即“你所经历的已经很难了”译为But you had a real tough time

一个月过去了，大家都开始为第三位年轻人的安危担心，他却一步一蹭，衣不蔽体地回来了。他发枯唇燥，只剩下清炯的眼神：

A month later

everybody began to worry about the safety of the third young man However

he finally showed up

hobbling along in rags His hair was off-colored and his lips parched

but his eyes were clear and bright

要点：

1，“一步一蹭”即“一瘸一拐”译为hobbling，其同义词有hobble

shuffle shamble stagger wobble，都是表“跛行”的意思；rags一般指“破布，抹布，破衣烂衫”此处in rages即“衣不蔽体”

2，“发枯”即“头发失去光泽”译为off-colored

3，“清炯的眼神”即“清亮的眼神”his eyes were clear and bright

“酋长，我终于到达山顶。但是，我该怎么说呢？那里只有高风悲旋，蓝天四垂。”

“Lord

I succeeded in reaching the summit Well

what shall I say to you about it There was nothing there but the wailing highland wind and the blue sky hanging over the land”

要点：

1，“高风悲旋”= the wailing highland wind，wail意为“哀嚎，痛哭”，这种小词的使用可以大大缩短行文长度，并使文章更加生动，前面的bobble等词，也体现了这点

2，“蓝天四垂”可按“蓝天笼罩大地”，译为the blue sky hanging over the land

综述：

这几段的亮点都在于四字词的使用和翻译上，注意小词的积累和使用~

“你难道在那里一无所见吗？难道连蝴蝶也没有一只吗？”

“So you saw nothing at all Not even a butterfly”

“是的，酋长，高处一无所有。你所能看到的，只有你自己，只有‘个人’被放在天地间的渺小感，只有想起千古英雄的悲激心情。”

“No

lord

nothing All you can see is yourself You feel how insignificant you are in this infinite universe and how sorrowful and agitated you are at the thought of heroes through the ages”

要点：

1，“只有‘个人’被放在天地间的渺小感”其中“渺小感”这个词不容易译出，因此译者转换说法，将其译为“你会感到自己在无限的宇宙里有多么渺小”即You feel how insignificant you are in this infinite universe下句的“想起千古英雄的悲激心情”也是采取了同样的策略

2，“千古英雄”可按“历代英雄们”理解，译为heroes through the ages，其中through all / the ages是出镜率比较高的一个词了，可做状语，如Through the ages

Earth mother has nurtured the innumerable generation of descendants with the sweet milk古往今来，地球妈妈用甘甜的乳汁哺育了无数代子孙。

综述：

转换词性或句子成分，是翻译常用方法~必备技能~

“孩子，你到的是真的山顶。按照我们的传统，天意要立你做新酋长，祝福你。”

“Son

you’ve reached the real mountaintop According to our tradition

you’ll undoubtedly be made our new tribal chief My best wishes to you”

真英雄何所遇？他遇到的是全身的伤痕，是孤单的长途，以及越来越真切的渺小感。

What makes a real hero A real hero has cuts and bruises all over his body

he is all alone on a long journey and he feels with increasing sincerity how all he is

要点：

1，“真英雄何所遇？”即“怎样才能造就一个真英雄呢？”译为What makes a real hero

2，“他遇到的是全身的伤痕，是孤单的长途，以及越来越真切的渺小感。”中文有时习惯用一个动词带起一串宾语，在我们来看很好理解，但是对于外国人来说就比较抽象了，很难体会到其中的意思，因此翻译时要把“遇到”具体化，即“他遍体鳞伤，孤独地行走在长长的旅途上，并越来越真切地感到自己有多么渺小”，译为A real hero has cuts and bruises all over his body

he is all alone on a long journey and he feels with increasing sincerity how all he is

综述：最后一句的翻译值得注意，它是一个译者的翻译意识的体现~